If two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My father in heaven. Matthew 18:19
So since the summer has come, I have received very curious people delicately asking, "So I've been meaning to ask you, how did you do it this year on one teacher income?" I honestly didn't think many people would even wonder but many have. This has inspired me to write how and why we did it. And made shed some light on God's will and how he'll move earth to make it happen.
Ever since I was a little girl all I wanted to be was a stay-at-home mom. When I met Sam, I fell in love and blindly we knew that all we needed was love to survive. That being said, haha, when we found out I was pregnant in the fall of '09, our biggest thought was "AHH, we're NEVER gonna survive!" See, we are both teachers. That job comes with a notorious notion that we make no money. And it's partly true. But, when I found out I was pregnant, we saved ALOT of my income and on May 11, 2010 we became parents to a wonderful little boy. And as I held him I knew I didn't want to let go.
After 3 months of summer bliss, came the big decision whether or not I'd be going back to work. Lord knows, I didn't want to, and Sam and I prayed, sought counsel, fought, freaked out, and finally came to the begruding decision that I would be returning to work that August 1. To say I was without peace was an understatement. I was heartbroken. And everyday when I handed that warm bundle over to my amazing Mom to care for until 3:30 (or whenever I could throw things together to fly out the door) I burst into tears. And people used to tell me "at least it's not daycare." To which I would respond, I don't care if the Pope is watching my son, if it's not me, it's not what I want.
Through a series of events, I decided to speak to Sam again about a month in, and yet again bring him my request to stay home, as if through the tears he didn't know haha. We prayed, fasted, and came to the conclusion that we knew this desire for me to stay home was placed in our hearts so why weren't we doing it? Fear? At that moment we came into agreement and I put in my leave that day.
Has it been easy? Honestly, yes. How did we do it? We just did. No, we didn't use credit cards. In fact we paid off debt. We bought a house which is actually SAVING us money each month. Ha, God is good. We used descretion. One week, we might be able to go out to dinner, the next week, not. God brought people in our life that blessed us beyond belief. We are still living on diapers from my showers which I can hardly believe I was blessed SO much. Even the other day, we were on our last swim diaper and someone handed me 2 packs of his size swim diapers and said my kid grew outta these if you want them. If we needed something or heck even WANTED something, we prayed, and God provided it. But I can guarantee something, we never felt as though we lacked. Jackson has great shoes, I buy him fun clothing on a regular basis and he eats organic and natural foods. God provides it. We are able to do fun things like Gymboree, have a zoo pass, go on playdates, etc. God provides it. This is NOT boasting nor am I saying I can do more for my child than someone else can. I know that we aren't able to buy him the latest toy, take him on vacations and shop at Baby Gap (ok unless there's a sale haha) but I know that it's a season. God has promised me we'll get there, if we want to be there :) And I can promise you, he gives his kids what they need/want. He did it for us. He does it for us.
Why did we do it? Well mostly because Sam and I are both in agreement, that it's what God wants for our family. We felt that Jackson would have the most peace and stability having a routine. We wanted him to view our home as peaceful, a place he knew and was familiar with. We wanted my main and only focus to be Sam and Jackson. And before all you Women's Lib people hate me, yes I DO believe that is my priority. As Sam's priority is Jackson and I. Family comes first, always.
With this being said, after again alot of prayer and what we know God has shown us, I will be returning to work part time this fall. This time I have a peace. I know God has given me this ideal job with ideal hours to work. It isbest for our family which is His family too. This isnt' because this year was horrible and I HAVE to go back. This is what we felt like God brought us too, and to be honest, I'm even looking a little forward to it :) But I know one thing, God takes care of his kids. If it's God's will, he is gonna make it happen. We are proof :)
